Truth or Dare

When we last spoke I was lost in the midst of a 1/4 life crisis. I was flopping upstream through the rapids of career fulfillment, or lack thereof, and I asked you, my good friends, ‘what should Miss Nina be when she grows up?’

You responded with some excellent suggestions. But I’m not sure if I can put into practice—at this point in my life and talent level—the suggestion of becoming a rock star. As much as I share your vision of me belting out tunes, captivating massive audiences, and making headlines with my frequent and favourable costume changes, it’s a fantasy rather than an actual applicable avocation. But, can we just indulge the fantasy for one second? I mean, now that the stage is set why don’t we just take one spin around the set before leaving in a cloud of mist and strobe lights.

Backstage: my dresser has coiffed me, painted me, and zipped me into sequins. I’m ready to sparkle on stage like a disco ball. I practice my scales to warm up my voice, and call the dancers around for the prayer circle. We hold hands, express what we’re grateful for and wish each other a great show. We hug it out, clap our hands, take a final sip of designer water and make our way to the wings.

The music is pumping and the bass starts to pulse through our veins. It’s show time! With thunderous applause I appear on stage and the crowd goes wild. Hours of pitch perfect singing, perfectly choreographed moves, and wonton sex appeal pours on stage for my adoring fans to lap up. At the end of the excitement the paparazzi wait in their fox holes to sniper pictures of me for the tabloids. Of course, I look fabulous in all the pictures—angering the poachers at Star Weekly to no end. There’s not going to be any photo’s of me floating in the editorial of ‘Stars Without Make-up’ this issue. I’m golden. I’m the Madonna of my generation and no one can touch me... at least those are the rules this fantasy is being played by.

Wow... back to reality. Time to shake the corset of rock star life off and gear back down into the sensible shoes of an office worker. I’m sure that my fantasy of living the star life hasn’t been influence in the slightest by the cinematic classic, Madonna: Truth or Dare, a true tour de force of the power of cone tits, simulated masturbation and verbal abuse of Hollywood actors. Words and themes to build a life on? So, with that little indulgence over and time now between my original plea for help and reality, Miss Nina still doesn’t know what she’s going to be when she grows up, but no matter, for I, Miss Nina have decided to never grow up.

I will continue to step through life as if it were a screenplay, comedy at times, drama at others, but all the while captivating. I will play my role dependent on mood and set, I will practice my one-liners, I will put on a good show and continue to inspire my fans (co-workers?). Although, as I say this, it all sounds exhausting: fake, fake, fake. When is it real, real, real?

Truth or dare? I take dare. Miss Nina, do you dare to be true to yourself and only do the things that make you feel whole? Yes, yes I do. So now—when I grow up—I think I’ll be a lesbian.